Rhod Gilbert on BBC Radio Wales.

If you are listening to this, you are listening to Rhod Gilbert's Best Bits, some of of the best bits of my Saturday morning radio show, live on BBC Radio Wales. This week, I'm in a studio in London with Mr. Tom Wrigglesworth.

I just noticed. You've ... uh, since you've been here ... I / you were sat there, looking through the paper and things / hair / your face / just flicked your hair back off your face, and you have the worst newspaper stains on your head __ any person __ possible to see / unless / let's / some kind of make-up party last night / you've got streaks of black / either makeup or newspaper print, all over your forehead / what could it be if it wasn't / newspaper / like / I don't know / let's have a look at your hands / your hands are fine. Your hands are ... your hands are as pink as a day when you were a boy. You've got black streaks / Really? / all the way down your / Where were you last night? / Uh ... I went ... I just went to / fancy dress party / that / why is it? / Mind you, I did / I did get more attention / normal / from screaming girls outside / maybe that__ what they'd turned up to see / your new look. .... It's all very odd. We'll get to the bottom of that in a minute / I can see / kind of / slowly / because you can't / no mirror / no mirror / joking / I'm not / streaks / it's fine because this is radio / pointed out / 'll get away with it. / I'll tell you what. Have you ever wandered all day with something on your face / Well, there you go. I'm in / good feature already / very good feature / when I was about 20, I did some sort of manual work in London / you know / false ceiling / take that out / it had been there for years / top of the building / above that fake ceiling / goes / chimney / and everything / roof of the building, and ... and the quickest way I found was to just put on a pair of goggles and a breathing mask, and just stand on a crate, and just rip the ceiling down / rather than, sort of, doing it properly and gently / resulting in loads of soot just crashing over my face. / Yeah. / hence the goggles and breathing mask / walked through London back to where I was staying / how did you forget / covered in / because / no mirrors / no one to say, "By the way you are covered in soot" / through London / soot / like a panda / Well, there you go. There you go. __, I'll tell you what / already done it / you've created this feature inadvertently, and ... and you__ __ the first entry / today's feature / radio show / it's a really good one. Have you ever wandered around / something on your face you didn't know was there / embarrassing situation. ... 8 10 12 / text / email / bbc.co.uk. That's, it, ladies and gentlemen, that is today's feature.

you __ say / you / I / say / you / talking / your mic is up there / the situation is that Tom Wrigglesworth and I are in the BBC studio in London, you see, and the production team / in Cardiff / play / technical staff / right / George here in London / helps us out / and then / I've got a message / in my headphones / Tom doesn't wear headphones / preference / most co-hosts wear headphones so they can hear the producer. You / giving / two fingers to the production team / just to prevent damage to the hair / headphone / I can hear you. That's enough. / That's true. well, what you didn't hear was that, uh ... / in the first link / just / started / in the morning / the producer came in my ear / a bit far away from the mic?" And I said, uh, "Yes / sitting / from the mic / during the record, uh / we just played / we / sorted out / but he explained the reason why ... he explained the reason why he hadn't been sitting close enough to the mic was that the chair he had been given didn't have wheels. / That's true, though / what you were saying is / the chair / too far from microphone / because the chair didn't have wheels, you didn't know what to do / forgot / in old days, before / we used to pick up our chair and move it a few inches close to / the microphone / conscious of, you know, noise pollution / I didn't want this ... this show / absolutely / there's noghing ... / you know / like / hotel rooms / people / like / ever / 3 in the morning / people / I mean / really / moving furniture / I have heard that, yes. / it's really spooky, innit? / must / moving / I didn't want that sort of thing to, uh, to / show down ... that kinda thing / it would have been like this / but ... but the irony is / instead of hearing that noise / moving your chair / you were just going, "Oh, I can't believe / moving my chair / you can mentioon that if you like / so / we got that instead of just / bizarre noise / that people would have wondered about / moving furniture

Hey, we've already got a very exciting feature, which is, Have you ever gone around all day with something embarrassing on your face / Tom Wrigglesworth / black streaks all down / looks / it's amazing. And then, George, the technical guy here in London, just came in, and because / no mirror in the room / you didn't quite believe me, you asked him to / to verify whether / indeed / black streaks / I don't believe a word you're saying / "George, have I got / and he said / Huh, it's not too bad / as if ... as if having a certain level of black streaks / head / point at which it goes over the top / you / wash / I'm afraid / I don't mind you / it's not as cool as B__ if that ... if that's where you were going with this / it's definitely not as cool as / it is ... it looks ... it looks, uh ... if you dyed__ your hair, / Huh huh, / really cheap dye / What color? / I don't know. Black or darker. / All right. / darker than it is now / rinse it out / and then / streaks of it / you look like / your / hair / crying / down your / mascara all down the top / forehead / unless your're upside down / have that / Look, frankly, if you don't know what it is, how am I supposed to? You've got black streaks all over / just guessing / take offense / that said, / what / nothing on your hands / unless you ... unless you've just / reading __ paper with my face / with your face? / my hands were busy, so I just turned / trying to move / chair / hands / the only thing left / face / flop it over / you must have / something to cling / what it is / got / tube / nothing on your hand. We've established this / yeah / it hasn't got / hand / so, there might have been some sort of / London / maybe / face / I've seen this happen before. I've / seen somebody get / trying / in Paris / uh ... many years ago, when we were / jumping out of a tube train / we realized / stop / hang on / this is our stop / jumped out / all of us jumped out / last person / of the pack, jumped out last and got trapped / trapped for a good while / train doors / trap / shoulder or the bag / he was trapped with his face literally peering out, so, / door squashed / pushing his face together, and then / realize / opened it / two massive black rubber marks down the side__ of his face / yours isn't far off, mate / that didn't happen / What is it, then? / I don't know / I do love the fact / not / could have been worse / I left the flat with __ wife / and we split at the bank station / she would have said, "Oh, Tom, / between bank station / Oxford Street / I have been ninjaed / you have been ninjaed? / still / as george says / it's not too bad / it could have been a lot worse / そうだな。その程度で済んでめっけもんだな。

The other day, right? we ... we decorated the bathroom / hang on a minute / is / don't tell / painted ceiling black / no idea where this came from / on a totally unrelated matter, the other day / 顔の汚れとはまったく関係のない話として ... / red and white, with a little bit of black / involved / you noticed / planned / in the first place / mirror / really g__y / unrelated subject / we needed white paint, right? So, we bought / do / massive tubs / like / you know / school / the size of / baked beans / and / I was getting out of the car / nearly dropped it / I'm not the best footballer, but I, sort of, caught it / left / balanced / bounced off / did enough / now / someone drops a tin of paint in the street. ... You must have seen / I'm not sure / I've ever seen it / several times / every five years / banana skin, you know / I'm not sure / seen / I have seen / paint / floor / one dropped / one assumes / you know / made a mess / face, it seems / but / very nearly / which / reside / always wonder / I've / met anyone / tin of paint / even struggling / launch / as a feature / must be / have you ever dropped a tine of paint? / well / could / let's do it / open / bucket / a little bit / damn fine mess / of your local area / I prefer / keep it simple, mate / keep it simple / paint / feature2 / Feature 1 / related / all day / there / something on that / high hopes / paint already / Hi Rhod and Tom / tell / one / unexpected / in fast / test you / non / this is from / from / says / so / get / so unexpected the thing / face / know / feature / something / didn't realize / thing / caught / walk through / dark lane / bus from work / picturing the scene? / Yeah. / work / dark / from / dark / bus / nice / red / smart / talking / retired people / anyone / a few local people / talk / people / I got home / mirror / my face / covered in / history / facts in the past / dates / that would be awesome. ... All right / kind / George / all / guess / Dates? / history / again / box / face was covered in mud / mud? / I mean, I don't know / maybe it's just / sort / dirt / know / first / absolutely / steam room / in a spa hotel / cucumber on my eyes / mirror / even / where / hot stones / checked / mirror / all / all over my face / nobody / nothing / coat / face / tell / say / wouldn't / this / stranger / if / better leave it / radio / I don't know / maybe / too / yeah / leave / he was dragged into the situation / someone / said / stranger / red / know / also got toothpaste all around his / probably / I thought / looking for a pub / probably / somebody / blood pouring / trousers ripped / afraid / looking for / Red Lion / obviously on a date / start again / Feature 3 / someone / Rhod "stranger" Gilbert / red / you know where it is / person / bunch / smart / day / all / steps / streaks / left corner / chin / see / what would you say / by / mate / covered / mud / toothpaste / OK, yeah, yeah. / point is / would / great / feature / Feature 1 today is / have / which / fully expect to take off / have / Feature 3 / let us know / clearly / on a date / flowers / would you say something / something on your face / toothpaste / I can't wait / emails on this

three / go / one / I bet you / feature / all I'm saying / Radio Wales, mate / realize / Feature 2 / have / tin / paint / just / nearly / nearly / prompted / willy nilly / cushioned / cunning thing of / foot / before / this may be / feature 4 / I quite often / just / floor / get / often / to myself / if you think about it / couple of inches / ground / cushioning / energy / disperse / elsewhere / very / this / black paint on my face / bathroom / hot topic / decorated it / off to the gym / lost any weight / she said, uh, / scales / in the bathroom / I don't know / if she / carpet / weighs / move / bathroom / left / balance / floor being level / basically / fast / here / stop paying / don't listen to / saying all these things / even / morning TV / around / all this stuff / here it comes / if / scales / there you go / pop / scales / drop / here / that's it / I was walking trhough the day / almost / walking / through / evening / nice / dave / see / poet / all you've got / translator / good / and Tom / I / this is / could / feature / all / realize / face / even / tin of paint / if / stranger / clearly / Red Lion / Red Lion / date / blind / tell / face / mud / color / no / would / think / intervention / depends on / color / somebody / date / Red Lion / rush / internet / one in one out / depends / like / people / you upbringing / I did a gig / table / women / approx. 40 / years old / they / you know / very negative experience / standup / problem / most / this / really weird / from city airport / yesterday / train from / city / on it / gaggling on / people / this gig / gaggling / train / I know / did I / no / if / previous / demographic / suppose / complete / any / color / correct / think / think / think / haven't / other / make / before / call / somethng / thing / through / say / hang / hang / do / like / hang / responsibility / if / low / might / quite / funny / whole / whole / should / think / like / person / not / because / totally / person / person / would / who / feature / wasn't / recognize / great / mind / ten / before / great / useless / this / any / back / good / walking / shopping / stuff / smiling / presume / hotties / hot / attractive / people / smiling / wow / today / pink / hair / making / day / kind / daughter / that's /

japan / powdered / blackboard / different / all / no / thing / say / presumably / otherwise / didn't / was / right / noticed / next / thought / funny / danger / isn't / joker / eat / alone / class / cartoon / whatever / funny / office / joke / chalk / dear / face / but / luckily / quite / did / whole / shift / where / pair / stuck / after / tumble / static / girls / lunch / known / there / why / would / stuck / back / like / mean / poetic / presumably / must / loose / dressing / back / experience / about / did / experience / only / narrowed / method / like / what / kinds / type / completely / off / no / connecting / fold / belt / tie / separate / no / separate / spa / separate / blew / holding / happen / type / loose / connected / standard / back / nothing / belt / sewn / belt / what's / saying / sensible / washing / purposes / wearing / something / else / done / often / coveres

よろしければこちらもどうぞ↓

Rhod Gilbert's Best Bits エピソード・リスト